Aeyra

My brain. XD

I'm talking about Mitsuhiko.... Oh, I got inspiration. *currently writing*

*sigh* I love angst stories... I reviewed this on ff.net.

I need an idea first though...

Definitely. Let me make it a little clearer... ShinRan 4ever!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

An LHC member

Hey! Welcome to DCW! Home to the freaks who love DC just like you! Hi, I'm Aeyra, the math freak of DCW. I'm also Aeyra on ff.net, just BTW. I hope you have tons of fun here!

Next chapter.. Plz comment. The story is on ff.net BTW. Penname= Aeyra. Shinichi's POV I have no idea exactly what drove me to invite Hattori over to Tokyo, but I did, despite slight protests from Haibara and Professor Agasa. "Why did you ask him to come?" asks Haibara, her face a mixture of curiosity and what looks like envy. Soon after Ran had turned me away, Haibara confessed her love to me, saying that she hadn't wanted to do it when Ran and I were still together. She hadn't taken the APTX, and said she would if I was willing to accept her feelings. I explained as gently as I could that Ran was the only girl I would ever be able to love, and she backed off, staying Haibara Ai. But her thoughts still appear in her actions. Sheesh, does she think I'm inviting Hattori over for a date or something?! I just want to talk to him in person, because a phone can only bring me his essence. I need his cheerful enthusiasm right now- just hearing his voice, even laced with sorrow, had been enough to make me happier. "Kazuha dumped Hattori. Ran dumped me. I think it'll be easier for us to relate and talk than you and me." That probably wasn't the smartest thing to say seeing as her face lights up with anger, even though it doesn't show in her voice. "Relate and talk? What state do you think you're in? You think I haven't realized you've been overdosing on drugs for the past few weeks? This morning was just you getting desperate! Go look at yourself in a mirror, Kudo-kun! You look like you're dead!" she says, her voice cold and monotone even though her words pierce me like barbed arrows. I'm currently lying on Ai's bed, which was moved so it sits in the downstairs lab, out of sight and in easy reach of different medicines. I try to get up and prove that I'm perfectly capable of motion when I lurch forward, feeling a fiery burn in my throat. Hacking and panting, I gesture to Haibara, and she immediately understands, rolling her eyes. Haibara icily hands me a bag, and I puke what's left of my stomach into it, the acrid scent burning my nostrils. "See what I mean?" Her eyes seem worried and yet gloating, happy that she won this mini battle. "It's nothing," I rasp out, my throat feeling as if it is on fire, tongue unable to stand the disgusting taste of Advil mixed with last night's dinner. "Talking to Hattori'll be no problem." Her eyes soften, glow with a peculiar blue light. "Kudo-kun, why do you want to see him so badly? You won't talk to any of your other friends, your parents and most of the time you ignore me and Professor Agasa. Why was it the moment you heard the Professor answer the phone and say 'Ah, Hattori-kun' that you regained some of your energy? What is he that the rest of us aren't?" Her all-knowing eyes seem to pierce through me, penetrating my thoughts. "He's just my best friend. Is it weird that I want to see him? Is it Haibara?" I hand off the reeking bag of vomit to the Professor, who fast-walks to the trash can, not wanting to be caught in the crossfire. Can't blame him- whether or not you're in love with your best friend (who is the same gender as you) is not a subject most people would wish to talk about. Wait, when did either of us mention love? I think, realizing that that particular thought was all me. It unravels itself, revealing more of its wishes, and I am actually tempted by them. A sweet, sweet vision of his strong dark-skinned arms wrapped around me, warm and gentle. His chocolate hair scraping my forehead as he leans down, his eyes shining with passion, lips parted. I want this kiss- I'll do anything to stop it. I'm a guy! How can I envision myself kissing Hattori? But I'm not powerful enough to push him away, and he presses closer, allowing his warm, cinnamon-scented breath to settle on my face, letting me savor the scent. Without further hesitation he hungrily plunges his tongue into my mouth, pushing me down in the process. I answer him with a newfound hunger of my own, and both of us in this torrid sharing of passion. I don't want to stop. I want him so badly. I'm afraid he'll leave me if I don't give all I've got for even a second. He's got me pinned down, hands gripped tightly on my shoulders, his body draped over mine, trapping me. I don't mind. He belongs on top. Shit, shit, shit! I scream silently, breaking into a cold sweat of fear and disgust. How could I possibly want that? I-I'm in love with Ran, I'll never be in love with anyone else. Even though she abandoned me. Even if she's never coming back. And out of all people... Damn Shinichi, you've really messed up big time. No, you're messed up big time. "Kudo-kun, it's not weird that you want to see Hattori-kun, but it definitely is weird that you just zoned off and seemed to be having a happy daydream. As far as I remember, you don't daydream. Especially not whispering 'Hattori'." Her eyes are narrowed in suspicion and envy, but her expression shows concern. "Kudo-kun, your fiasco with Ran has affected you way more than you think." "How can it affect me more than I think?" I laugh, sounding more than somewhat insane. It's partially fueled by sickness, somewhat fueled by true craziness. "Here I am, puking up my guts after a suicide attempt- which unfortunately failed- and broken after she left. Shattered, destroyed, use whatever adjective you like. I am perfectly aware of the extent of the damage thank you very much." She frowns angrily as I say 'unfortunately failed' and starts ranting. "I don't know what you're thinking, Kudo-kun. There are so obviously people who would care if you died! She's not the person who was ever in your life! Your parents, your friends, Hattori, me. Even she would care. You know she's still friends with you- she's just sorting it out." "Then she obviously doesn't know me anymore. The only text she sent was one telling me she started dating Hondou. Hondou! She didn't ask how I'm doing, if I'm still hurting! She doesn't love me. How can I help wanting to die, Haibara? How?" "Forgive and forget. The only person I've ever loved was- and is- you. But, like her, you didn't return my feelings. You don't see me trying to down over a dozen painkillers with a beer, do you?" she inquires, reminding me of those vague, lost memories of this morning. Hmm… Don’t really recall that part. "Did I drink a beer?" I ask out loud, a little hazy on the exact details of this morning's events. "I can't remember- headache mixed with no sleep." "It's not my fault you tried to die at three o'clock in the morning. Luckily, I heard the glass break when the beer dropped out of your grip. It's why you're not dead right now. Even if you don't appreciate it now, trust me, someday you will." Her tone is matter-of-fact and I see no point in fighting it. I hear the words behind it that she's definitely hinting, "One day where you'll be in love with me." I snicker, knowing her fantasy is absolutely impossible with me. One, I'm still too infatuated to fall in love (or am I?), and two, if I have to fall in love with someone, I don't want it to be her. Sure I owe her a lot. She gave me the APTX antidote, which in turn, gave me the courage to confess everything to Ran. She helped me take down the syndicate, even if she ended up getting cold feet once Gin and Vodka appeared. She's been at my side through thick and thin- my most trusted partner. She's still here, caring for me even though I give her nothing in return. But this isn't enough for her to repay me. You'd think after a couple years you can just forget someone close to you who ruined your life and forgive them, but how can I forgive? She's the reason I shrunk, the reason I got separated from Ran, the reason Ran gave up on me. She's why I'm lying here on her bed, wishing for everything to end. Why my heart and body are both shattered almost beyond repair. Could anyone forgive sins that great? You'd have to be perfect, and trust me, I'm not. "Is there any beer left?" I ask teasingly, smiling. "I could use a drink." "No way, Kudo-kun. You're lucky you're not suffering from a severe hangover right now. If you're thirsty, then ask for a glass of water or juice. No alcohol." She gives a loud 'harrumph' and crosses her arms as she waits for my response. "What, not going to get it for me?" I say, leaning in closer to her just to try and make her blush. It's the only form of entertainment I have at my disposal at the moment- playing around with Haibara. Do I feel kind of bad for leading her on like this? Yeah. Do I give a shit? Hell no! Do I give a shit about anything? Nope, doesn't seem like it. "O-only if you say 'Pretty Please'," she stutters, still sounding like her normal, cold self as the expected flush comes into her pale cheeks. How funny. "Pretty please then." She quickly walks over to the edge of the lab where the sink is, and turns on the faucet. Grabbing a cup from the cabinet above, she fills it with water. The sound of the rushing liquid is comforting and it helps me sort out my fucked up emotions. I sort them into three piles: my still-living love for Ran, my incessant want to tease Haibara (which is quite cruel), and why I had a dream of kissing Hattori. I mean, my old self, the whole one, would immediately run away and puke from disgust. Okay, overexaggeration, but I would have been revolted. Currently, I'm savoring the idea, letting it take over my mind. If I don't want Haibara, doesn't that leave me with Hattori? Thanks for reading!

A self-pronounced music nerd.

<3 Someone who likes ice cream.

4000! (success!)

Let's see now: Hakuba

Wish I had some... It's fun. DCW

www.fanfiction.net I was giving my friend the link.

Liar, you're selling Vero-kun's. I can't log onto my grades!

Well, funvince has two really good fictions... 'The Mystery of Conan Edogawa' and 'Karma'.

No, I just happened to have the 49th volume with me today (the volume featuring Eisuke) so I drew the back of it. Don't worry, I wasn't purposely angering you. Yeah, I have school. Your Spring Break seems a little late though.. Usually mine's way earlier.

Thanks. This will anger you, but I drew an Eisuke drawing during school today. He looks so cute without his glasses.