CarpetCrawler

Yelling at a game is one thing (and even that tends to get annoying), but when it's loud screeching it's like, come on man.

Kotaku is an awful website.

That was a disappointing end to Parks and Recreation's season. :-/

Are Comcast and AT&T really our only two options here for internet? This is awful.

guys I may or may not think @Mruff221 is the greatest person ever. As a hint: he is.

Iron Man 3 was tremendous. Go see it.

I think once I return from seeing Iron Man 3 I am taking a long-ass nap.

Also, I'm seeing Iron Man 3 tomorrow at 12:30 PM. Excited. Looking forward to @Mruff221's cameo as well.

May or may not be love serenading that copy of Super Mario Bros. 3 right now.

Google Chrome is very bad at hide-and-seek: http://t.co/QXnFU73zwM

I splurged and I bought this: http://t.co/T3o0J3aFnw

Just learned that there is a Parks and Recreation porn parody.

Why do I torture myself: http://t.co/vC2HYUCyqD

Doing some stuff around the house, responses will be slow!!

"Don't start in with your white zone shit again" "You're only saying this because you want me to have an abortion!!"

(also feel free to send me questions, dudes)

So how long's it gonna take for movie producers to realize that nobody likes child sidekicks?

A part of me wants to go back to bed, but I should probably get up now.

I'm just proud that I made it on the screen, that was tremendous.

Season 9 might be a sad way for the show to go out, but Jim and Pam working out in the end is something special to me.

Whenever I sleep anymore I just have crappy dreams. Today has been no exception.

Starting to feel sick, but I guess it's been awhile since I was last ill, so that's a positive?

Just uploaded a video of me beating the Frog Suit Challenge for the Mario Marathon at Something Awful: http://t.co/GwEoRjnKRH

you've met with a terrible fate, haven't you?

Listening to the Majora's Mask soundtrack.