First you may want to read the story I posted here entitled Meeting Under the Moonlight, just so you'll have an idea about my style. And I still think that IU, Aeyra, or Chelsea can help you out better.
Hmm...interesting.
You said we may go ahead and criticize as much as we want. Well, I can be a very harsh critic, but I'm not good at giving tips. Anyway, keep going!